CHAPTER 2017: IMPORTANT LESSONS OF LIFE & HOW TO LIVE YOUR BEST LIFE IN 2018
I can't tell you what the most important lesson learned in life is. But I can tell you that I'm really freaking excited for 2018.
1993-2017 - I seemed to have adopted the common invincibility attitude of the naive. As if I'm going to live a happy go lucky life until I'm 200 years old where nothing bad or traumatic will happen to me. 2017 hit me hard and made me realize that time and life is not guaranteed. And with this realization came the humbling lessons from chapters of my story. A story isn't worth the read without a good plot and moral. I don't know about you but, I'm hoping to write a good one.
Here are some life lessons I have learned this past year that will hopefully make life a little easier.
1. TIME WAITS FOR NO ONE
Every single year, my new years goal is to take control of my time management and be punctual. Who knew it's physically possible to get progressively worst at something after making a goal to do better. But it is. And I, Chelsea the 'Deadliner', am a testimony to that. It is so important to RESPECT PEOPLE'S TIME. Whether you think the meeting with your passive aggressive boss, that date with the rando from that party your friend talked you into going on, or that dentist appointment which you avoid all year round is important to you or not - showing up late to a commitment shows that you are unreliable, irresponsible and straight up rude. And not only can it leave a bad impression on people, but you can also miss out on opportunities because of your poor time management. You don't want to miss out on the BIGGEST AUDITION OF YOUR LIFE because of this. Trust me on this one :(
2. TRUST THE UNIVERSE'S TIMING
If the universe loves me so much, why would it put me through such hardships? Call me cliche or whatever, but I'm a firm believer in everything happens for a reason. I literally convinced myself that these certain things - good and bad - have happened to me because the world is preparing me for success. I believe that the strongest warriors are equipped by their past battles. You may feel like you're defeated and you've lost the fight. But don't give up. You have your secret weapon to life. You just have to find it.
3. TIME IS MONEY
I hope none of us are investing our sacred time and energy in something we hate in 2018. Whether it's a relationship, job or lifestyle, everything you do is a choice. But more importantly, everything you do is an investment. Choose wisely.
I've done all the necessary research and made solid connections in 2017 to prepare for 2018 - my year of entrepreneurship. I'm working hard and making the difficult yet necessary cuts to limit my time working for others and in turn, find more time to work on myself. There's really no secret formula here... You just have to believe in yourself and your craft enough to take the risk and make the investment. To all you aspiring models - newsflash. Photo shoots aren't free. Your portfolio will probably cost you a pretty penny. Instead of aging your skin sulking over the hidden fees, use your energy to practice posing and marketing yourself in the industry. And this goes with anything. The best investment is the one you make in yourself.
4. DON'T SELL YOURSELF SHORT
If you're embarking on the exciting path of entrepreneurship, congratulations! We're in this together. My intention of starting this blog was not to start an online business and capitalize off my posts. Not at all. But after a few random successes and the ability to reach and attract an audience I didn't even know existed nor cared, I thought hmmm, I need to place a price tag on my brand. If you want me to promote your business to my audience, expect to pay. If you want me to write an article for you, expect to pay. If you want me to model your designs, EXPECT TO PAY. Why give you my talent, skill and audience in exchange for a shorter day? At the end of the day, time is money and I AM MONEY. Idk... many people like to sit on their high horse and believe they are doing someone else a favour when hiring them for free by "putting them on" and giving them a "great opportunity". And don't lower your rates! I'm learning to actually charge 15-20% higher than the initial rate of pay offered. As long as you are delivering high quality work and offering your client great value, you should not feel guilty for having a high price tag, or even a price tag for that matter.
5. COMPARISON IS THE THIEF OF JOY
I spent all of 2016 comparing. Although I can honestly say I compared less in 2017, I learned that comparison is the thief of joy. Want to know how to instantly make someone genuinely upset? Show them a picture of their ex with their attractive new partner...
Comparison usually robs me of all feelings of satisfaction, as we're constantly looking at what we don't have and what they do have. But comparison will happen inevitably, and instead of having it bring negativity, let's condition ourselves to elicit positive outcomes. I've learned that comparison is only beneficial when it fosters inspiration. Comparison now motivates me to do better and I place high value on my thoughts and the people, places and things I surround myself with, as I believe these things shape one's character and success. Who says you can't be traveling the world and being your own boss like your favorite travel blogger? Who says you can't be rocking the runway for Kanye like your favorite model? And who FREAKING SAYS YOU CAN'T LIVE LIFE AND ENJOY DOING IT. The only person who says it is you..
In 2018, let's strive to be compared to.
6. ACCOUNTABILITY IS KING
This was a hard lesson for me this year. I hate to admit that I have a hard time taking accountability for my actions. Especially when I'm in the wrong. But everything is a work in progress, right? If we always "never did anything wrong", then how can one become better? As your chapters unfold and life is happening to you, you need to commit to a storyline and take ownership of your plot. And always remember that you are a character in someone's story - whether you're the antagonist or protagonist - recognize your role in someone's storyline and realize the effect you have on other characters. I've ruined many relationships failing to do so. Not everything is all about you, Chels.
7. WIN WITHOUT BOASTING & LOSE WITHOUT EXCUSES
It's easy to claim responsibility when things go well, but we always seem to make excuses when they don't. I'm learning that my work speaks volumes and a voice isn't needed when your work speaks for itself. If you're finding success, that's amazing. Keep up with the strategy and keep grinding. It's definitely important to recognize your achievements and monitor your growth, but don't be afraid to recognize your faults and failures in the same breath. It's a lot easier to post yourself living your best life on the islands of Southern Thailand than it is to post yourself living the current broke life somewhere else.
8. SAY LESS
Again, your work speaks volumes. Definitely exercise your voice and speak your truth (or the digitally edited version). But don't let your talk overpower your walk. Just say less.
9. DON'T FEEL BAD ABOUT OUTGROWING PEOPLE
It's insane to me how quickly my circle enclosed. Especially while living abroad. My childhood friends were on different paths of life and doing different, yet more conventional, things. For me, if you're not with me experiencing something, then that's kind of your loss. Don't expect me to help you relive it by continuously retelling the story. Or don't be a total bitch and totally ignore the fact that I've been away and we haven't seen each other in years, but then continue to fill me in on your lame boyfriend drama and not fail to mention everything you've done right in the past year. Truth is, I probably don't care. And if I'm not fucking with your vibe anymore, don't be surprised we lose touch. We've already lost touch, homie. And it doesn't matter if we were playing hopscotch at daycare back in the day. Everyone is in your life at a certain moment for a reason. And sometimes after a few chapters, that character may not be needed anymore. They're no longer helping writing your story, you know? Instead, they're giving you writer's block.
10. IT'S NOT YOUR JOB TO GET PEOPLE TO LIKE YOU. IT'S YOUR JOB TO LIKE PEOPLE
I am not in control of homeboy or homegirl's emotions. Their feelings are beyond me. All I can do is put forth my best self and give people the same opportunity I'd like to be given. Have an open mind when it comes to networking, friendships and even relationships (to an extent..). When I stop caring about what other's think of me and focus on being the most present and best version of me, then I usually come home winning. One way or another. Just don't be a bitch, please.
I hope some of y'all can relate and these life lessons of 2017 have resonated with some of you. If they have, I'd love to hear about it in the comment section. What was your most important life lesson so far?
Peace & Love,
Want to know some life lessons I learned last year while living abroad? ---> 12 MONTHS & 12 LIFE LESSONS